beautiful things

you make beautiful things. you make beautiful things out of us.
could a garden come up from this ground at all?

i sat there wondering if these words were true. that God could make beautiful things out of something so broken. he made me. hope washes through me.

you make me new. you are making me new.

thank you my Abba. you make me new. you are unbelievably amazing.

*beautiful things by gungor

it always starts the same

"so there is this boy"... that's how it always starts. And it always has the same ending. For the longest time I thought it was just that I had fallen for complete idiots. But all along it was me. I close my eyes, and jump head first. I dive into these murky waters and I try to feel around for something to cling onto...  but I am left cold and struggling to swim back to shore by myself. My heart is an idiot. After this week I know that more than ever. I haven't learned much since I was 16...

a time to dance

Rejoice my soul. Joy overwhelms me and a fire burns within me with desire to praise the Lord for the bitter and the sweet. I can hardly hold back my excitement when speaking of this joy consuming by very being. I have never felt like this. This is not happiness, no; happiness comes and goes. But this joy, this joy will dwell within me during the highs and the lows. When you see that my day is filled with lamenting and sadness, remind me of this joy. The joy that God has blessed me with. I say this word blessed and I tingle. It warms me through and through. 

Defiance

Even the sky refuses to open up and cry. You can feel its sadness. You can see its gloom, not only a few tears drop. What I would do for some sun right now… some happiness. I am in the pursuit of happiness. Trying to find who I must be in order to be happy. I must be a rebel against the odds, to stand up against urge to swim in the emotions cascading from the sky. I feel as if the sun might burst through the clouds at any second just to prove that I am not the only one defying the gloom. But I know that wont happen any time soon. The leaves will be my allies soon enough, blaring in colors I have only seen in photographs. I look forward to the fall. Who knows maybe I will fall too?

Intro

so, here I am. I'm creating a blog so that everyone back home may still be with me while I'm there. This blog will mostly consist of short stories about my adventures while at college and the different obstacles I will have to overcome. there will also be some of my writings. just some of my thoughts in poetic verses. i think that this blog is more for me than anything else. after all, who knows if this will even be read? this will be my confidant, the one i tell my deepest thoughts and wishes with. i hope to find myself while i approach this project. i hope you find me too.